Season 1, Episode 1
Written by JellyfishJam38
Directed by JellyfishJam38
Episode Guide

Virus is the pilot episode of SpongeBob: Infection, the first out of the thirteen episodes in season one. It centers around the dawning of the titular infection, and the characters' struggles to survive as the mass hysteria and disease spreads.


  • (Cold opening. As the camera zooms at hurtling speed across the bustling streets of Bikini Bottom, the off-screen voice of SpongeBob speaks)
  • SpongeBob: Bikini Bottom... where the algae's always greener. Or so it was, before the Infection struck and tore our lives apart, leaving the algae a blood-flecked brown, forever lined with the bodies of friends and foes alike. These days, it's all about survival of the fittest. Remain prepared at all costs, the less seriously you take life, the more horrors will come your path. (The camera jarringly pans to the ground, showing a green, arthropodous, larger-than-normal insect with unsettlingly large fangs pacing towards a female fish sitting on a park bench, scanning through her purse) This is the bite that started it all, shaped what life would come to be. (The insect extraordinarily leaps at the fish, jaws spread wide, and latches onto her arm. As she yells, SpongeBob continues his monologue.) Bikini Bottom back then, (the scene fast-forwards to show a deserted, burning street with zombies trudging through the scenery) Bikini Bottom now. Sad how such a developed civilization went to waste so quickly. You know, I'm feeling nostalgic today. How about I tell my story like it is, from the very start? This is my life, my struggle, my cry for help in a silent world.
  • (Fade to black, and theme song plays)
  • (Cut to a wide shot of the outside of a nightclub. A caption at the bottom of the screen states: BIKINI BOTTOM - TWO DAYS BEFORE INFECTION. Close-up on the door as Mr. Krabs walks up to it, a gaggle of girls following him. He opens it, revealing a brightly lit, flashy disco with loud dance music playing, fish rambunctiously dancing, and alcoholic drinks being served aplenty. Walking in, he fumbles through his pocket and reaches for a dollar bill, grabs it and holds it up in the air.)
  • Mr. Krabs: Ladies, the Krab's all here! (the female fish seductively dance around him. Mr. Krabs ignores the groupies circling around him and orders a drink.)
  • Bartender: How may I assist you?
  • Mr. Krabs: I'd like your strongest brew.
  • Bartender: Let me see, I've got (he turns around to face the cascade of drinks behind him) Flaming Tongue Vodka, Super-Strength Scotch, and our trademark cocktail, the one-and-only (quiet) Hell's Dame.
  • Mr. Krabs: Dibs on the Hell's Dame. (He throws the dollar bill, which lands neatly in the bartender's hand)
  • Bartender: Here's your change, here's your cocktail, enjoy your drunkenness. (a bright red cocktail with blue froth and peaches around it is given to him, along with a small amount of money) Just consult me if you want more! I'm fluent in slurred speech!
  • (Mr. Krabs walks over to a chair, gently sipping his drink, cradling it like a child.)
  • Mr. Krabs: Money and alcohol - the cause of - and solution to - all the world's problems.
  • (Patrick walks by and sits on the spot next to Krabs.)
  • Patrick: Hey, Krabby my boy, what's going on?
  • Mr. Krabs: Nothing that's worth a damn. Just binge drinking and sexual conquests.
  • Patrick: Business as usual. (pauses) Not exactly for me, but for you. I'm often hailed as the life of the party, but I don't go to the extremes as much as you do.
  • Mr. Krabs: Don't you see, Pat? I've tried to get out of this downward spiral for too long now, but no matter what consultants, rehab workers, friends, family say, I just can't give it up. I feel as if I'm only a pawn in the game they call life.
  • Patrick: You know what they say? Money is the root of all evil. If your conscience hadn't been stolen by currency, I'd say you'd be living a whole different lifestyle.
  • Mr. Krabs: Your lectures about moderation honestly aren't helping. I came to party, not wallow in my own self-pity.
  • Patrick: It was kinda you who brought up the subject, it's not completely my fault.
  • Mr. Krabs: I guess you're right. But, I guess I'll see ya round. This is a club after all, and I'm assigned to my... erm, duties. (quickly chugs down Hell's Dame and runs back to the bartender.)
  • Patrick: (talking to himself in a contemplative state) I can't be the only sober one in this place. (the scene pans out to reveal everyone around him drinking) Should I just sit here, or should I join in with these morally gray antics? Okay, I'll... no. Should I... Ah, dammit. Don't wanna seem uncool. Wait, but didn't I swear sobriety? (cups his hands on head. Suddenly, the televisions in the room switch on, and a flashing sign stating "BREAKING NEWS" is present on each one. The scene zooms in on the TV, where a bearded announcer sits.)
  • News Announcer: Today, on Bikini Bottom News, a mysterious death has struck our streets. A female fish who will remain unnamed for this report, has been found dead in her home, (an image of a fish with a pixelated face appears) with signs of a never-before-seen illness. It's only been two hours, but already mass hysteria akin to the previous, disproved Mad Snail Disease (the image changes to a screen saying Contagion: Bikini Bottom) is splitting up families, closing stores, destroying lives... but this time it's not a hoax. An anchovy, who will be named "Subject F" for privacy purposes, and has had recent contact with the newly-deceased fish, has already displayed signs of a soon-to-be contagion. Lock your doors, wear full-body suits, remove all contact with known infected... just do anything to survive. (he pulls out a gun from his suitcase, aims it at his head, and the screen cuts to red then black. Cut back to the club. The lights all of a sudden switch off, and quarantine officers wearing full-body suits run in.
  • Quarantine Officer 1: Everybody, get out!
  • (The crowd run out of the bar, screaming, except for several drowsy drunks, who continue to stumble around, oblivious to the goings-on.)
  • Quarantine Officer 2: You hear me? GET THE HELL OUT!
  • (Mr. Krabs collapses on the floor, while the others still fumble around)
  • Quarantine Officer 1: Listen, drunkards? If you don't get out of here this instant, we'll be using force.
  • (Nobody budges, and the officers start shoving the drunks out of the door. Once they are all gone, they put a sign on the door stating "Under Quarantine - Do Not Enter")
  • SpongeBob (narrating): The next two days were hell on earth. Terror had overtaken the populace, causing insanity to spread like the prospective disease. Living in your worst nightmare would pale in comparison to the hysteria going on. Anyway, this is where I come in. (a swift zoom to SpongeBob standing outside his pineapple. Wind blows, fish run around screaming, and fire envelops much of the scenery. A hooded octopus sprays graffiti reading Judgment Day onto Patrick's rock, as SpongeBob idly watches in horror. He approaches the hooded fish, pulling down his hood to reveal a pink, shocked Squidward-esque face)
  • SpongeBob: What are you doing to Patrick's house?
  • Octopus: Don't you see the carnage taking place around you?
  • SpongeBob: Why, yes, I do, and you, sir, are only contributing to it.
  • Octopus: Word must be spread that judgment has finally come, and that only those with pure souls will successfully climb the stairway to Heaven, and achieve enlightenment and peace. Those who have committed unforgivable sin in their lives will be cast down in Earth to live their worst nightmares eternally.
  • SpongeBob: I may be naive at the best of times, but I'm not believing your bullsh*t propaganda! You live or you die, simple as.
  • Octopus: Oh, but there's far more to this than you think. You may as well just die on the spot, because I assure you, life will get a whole lot worse if you survive. Take Hell, turn the dial up to eleven, and, voila! You've got the future Earth!
  • SpongeBob: How can you predict this? You're just a simple octopod, who just happens to follow a religious faith. You never know, after this disease has taken its toll, a new and better world order could rise. Or, as you said, the world could plunge into chaos, which is all the most likely option. I'm not doubting there's a possibility to what you've just said, there sure could be, but don't go acting like you know everything when you don't. I've let wrong predictions get the best of me, and when you're shunned for your beliefs, passed off as a false prophet, that's when life loses all meaning.
  • Octopus: I see where you're coming from, but the end is nigh. I feel it in my bones. I know that after this plague of fear is over, a plague of something even more horrible is going to come its way.
  • SpongeBob: I could live what could be my last few days on this planet wracked with guilt and terror, and frankly, it's hard not to. But life is a precious thing, and if you make it worth it, it can be worth it, even when bodies are falling to the floor around you, and your most trusted allies have gone off the deep end.
  • Octopus: Goodbye. I have no business speaking with a man who disbelieves what's already scrawled in the prophesies. In case you change your shallow mind, and choose to speak with me again to gain more insight into what's happening around you, I am Father Edward, leader of the Nightcallers.
  • (He walks off, allowing SpongeBob to be in quasi-peace. He gets ready to have a stroll, but then he sees Patrick running, petrified, coming towards him. Patrick stops when he comes right up close to SpongeBob. We see an over-the-shoulder shot of Patrick blankly staring at SpongeBob in shock. After a few seconds, he breaks down in SpongeBob's arms, crying for the imminent future.)
  • SpongeBob: Patrick... I know the news is terrible... so many lives are going to be lost, but there's always a bright side to things.
  • Patrick: You don't understand. I've seen the movies, the symptoms that these people are getting... boils, rotting flesh, loss of mind... it all seems like a zombie apocalypse to me.
  • SpongeBob: Yes, seems strange. Your theories are never really too sound, but this one seems horrifyingly genuine. Looking back at some of the images leaked on the Internet of the cases, this seems very clear... but it can't be. Zombies are regarded as movie monsters, they shouldn't be real. (pauses) I don't know what to think.
  • Patrick: Did you see those crazy cultists marching across the streets? The Night-something, I think they called themselves.
  • (SpongeBob gasps)
  • SpongeBob: Nightcallers. The leader came up to your rock and sprayed graffiti on it. Something about Judgment Day, the day of reckoning... the Apocalypse.
  • Patrick: I saw a whole group of them.
  • SpongeBob: Really?
  • Patrick: Just come with me. I'll show you what has become of the once-wonderful Bikini Bottom.
  • (The two embark on a stroll through Bikini Bottom. As they go, they pass through such sights as fish who have succumbed to the disease writhing on the floor, convulsing, crazed townspeople in hysterics lighting buildings on fire, picking random fights, and spraying graffiti, Nightcallers and quarantine officers wandering through the streets, and one diseased person hobbling around with one arm spread wide, the other missing)
  • Patrick: It's one of... th-th-them.
  • SpongeBob: Oh my God. Sadly, I suspect you're right.
  • (The 'zombie' holds its arm up in the air, letting out an unintelligible moan. Patrick turns away, disgusted, his cheeks puffed out as if he's about to vomit.)
  • Patrick: I just can't look at that thing, that sad caricature of a respectable sea creature. I wish I had a weapon on my hands, so I could just put it out of its misery. (Tears well up in his eyes)
  • (The two continue walking until they discover a gang of white-suited scientists, who are having an argument with Sandy and Squidward)
  • Sandy (anger in her voice): Just take a look around and see what's happenin' around you! Just indulge in your self-indulgent snobbery while other people die in agony, you assholes!
  • Scientist: We have filled out a study that disproves existence of this disease. Under our medical guidelines, this is just a highly advanced flu, that will kill on occasions, and will damn right spread, but comes and goes. This is not some, paraphrasing your fantastical, idiotic words, "zombie virus". It is either a dangerous flu or an outbreak of food poisoning.
  • Squidward: Just listen to me for one second, you skeptic. Just look at that, for lack of a better word, zombie, behind you. That couldn't have been caused by a ***damned flu, could it?
  • Scientist 2: We are proficient in the field of scientific discovery and knowledge, and know more about disease than you ever will. If you do not listen to us, you will be clinging to a falsehood. Now, now, we wouldn't want that. A little, sad, sad, outcast, crying over a so-called zombie apocalypse that will most likely have run its course in the next few days.
  • Sandy: You ain't done nothin' but cause a ruckus! Why don't you just fess up and admit that you're just lullin' people into a false sense of security, so that they're unprepared for death? Go ahead on, admit it. (she pulls an enraged face and draws her fists)
  • Scientist: Come on, resort to that karate nonsense. We've studied viruses that, if we let loose, could leave you scattered bones in the space of two seconds.
  • Squidward: How incredibly mature, threatening the logical and correctly-thinking with death. If I were you, I'd just quit your publicity stunt. As Sandy correctly stated, do we want people to be unready for their possibly inevitable death?
  • (A third scientist empties his bag to grab a jar filled with swarming, large, red-and-yellow paramecium.)
  • Scientist 3: It's not a threat, it's a will-be. These babies we broke the laws of science to create. Anybody who disagrees with our points of view will simply be obliterated. Buzz. Snap. Ahhh! Gone.
  • Sandy (sarcastically): Oh, avoid an alternate viewpoint or die? Wonderful way of thinking! That disease that's spreading around and killin' everyone slowly is a mere flu, and everything's gonna be alright in the next few days! (angry again) I think everyone whose families have been torn apart, whose days are numbered, whose minds have been ravaged by hysteria should certainly follow your example! Also, tell that to the zombie over there. I'm sure he'll appreciate your skepticism, dang-nabbit!
  • (The two quickly skate away and hide in a street corner, panting and sweating. The scientists slowly twist open the jar, but stop.)
  • Scientist 2: I think the coast is clear. Move along.
  • (Walking away, SpongeBob and Patrick come to discuss matters with Sandy and Squidward.)
  • SpongeBob: What was that hubbub all about?
  • Squidward: Oh, just some self-righteous scientists who are trying to pass this whole epidemic off as a flu.
  • Sandy: Oh yeah, and they also tried to kill us with some specially-bred viruses. If I didn't know better, I'd say they released this plague into Bikini Bottom.
  • SpongeBob: If they've been meddling with science to create those monstrosities, who says they couldn't have started this whole catastrophe? You don't need to say "if I didn't know better", this could be a rational explanation for the whole thing. But isn't it strange that I haven't seen any of these entities, the Nightcallers and whatever those scientists call themselves, until now?
  • Sandy: Actually, back durin' my time in Texas, I had close contact with that group. The SBAC, they called themselves. Scientific and Biological Advances Committee. Now, since fish can't live on dry land, I'd never actually met them in person. We only knew each other through phone calls.
  • Squidward: And since you've never actually seen them in person, how do you know these are members of the SBAC?
  • Sandy: As they walked away, I noticed that there was a very familiar logo on the scientists' backs. Looked a bit like a potion being poured onto a sideways coat of arms. After a lil' bit of thinking, I recalled seeing it on dossiers, letters, leaflets, et cetera, that the SBAC sent me.
  • Patrick: Sounds like suspicious business. I've never heard of these guys.
  • Sandy: I was suspecting you wouldn't know about them. They keep silent about their business, and often take a second job to hide their support of the agency. For years, they've been notorious among the whole of the atoll for their dirty deeds, all performed in the name of science. They've bred deadly diseases, were responsible for many cases of vivisection, created the nuclear test site that exploded ninety-five years ago... all sorts of horrible things. The BBBI, the police force... they've never got round to stopping their business, as they're located in the deepest, darkest, most secret region of Bikini Bottom.
  • SpongeBob: You've had contact with inherent evil?
  • Sandy: Back then, I didn't know it. I just thought they were an average science agency. It was only when they began to reveal more information about themselves in their many forms of contact with me that I realized the severity of what I had done trustin' them... givin' out my personal information to them. Maybe that's why they targeted me just then.
  • Patrick: Why have they suddenly revealed themselves just now, then?
  • Sandy: If it was them who created the disease, they could be attempting to create a diversion so nobody knows about it. Or, simply, they could just be abandoning all sense of secrecy, because of the impending doom that is set to befall us all. It's better to let people know in their dying moments, so they don't go searching for an answer.
  • Squidward: Makes sense. But, how one can create a disease of this scale is beyond comprehension. There's often explanation for abhorrent acts, but why would anyone do such a thing?
  • Sandy: Why would anyone do such a thing? Remember, we have no evidence that the SBAC had anything to do with this.
  • Patrick: If they have, the writing's on the wall though.
  • SpongeBob: Explaining the unexplainable never works. We can do as much guesswork as we want, but we'll never find out the true origin of this... this infection.
  • (The gang continue their stroll around Bikini Bottom with the addition of Sandy and Squidward, until Sandy stops at a disturbing sight, which the others only partially see. Two zombies are dragging Nancy Suzy Fish along the street by her flippers, as she screams in terror, waving her arms around for something to grab on to. One of the zombies bites her leg as blood sprays out of the wound.)
  • Sandy (crying): If the SBAC could see this... (suddenly the light in her eyes changes, and she tightens her muscles, poised for an attack. The zombies are continuing to make a bloody mockery of Nancy's torso, and as they stop to take a fleshy bite, Sandy charges and attacks, knocking out the first zombie's teeth with a single punch. The zombie falls onto the ground, and Sandy continues punching it, until her hands are sticky with fresh blood. It gets off the ground, to flee from the scene of the battle, and the other zombie brainlessly follows, groaning. Sandy comes up to the scene of the carnage, where the fish lies, and picks her up.)
  • Nancy: Hey... old friend. Been a long time... since I've seen you... but honestly... I doubt you wanted... to see me like... this...
  • (Sandy places her hand over a large wound on Nancy's belly)
  • Sandy: I'm sorry. I'm so damn sorry.
  • Nancy: It's... okay. There's nothing... you could do... anyway. This... was written... in the stars.
  • (she looks up at the sky, and stops breathing. Sandy shuts her eyes, and lightly places her on the ground, sobbing uncontrollably. SpongeBob races towards her, however the rest continue to hide, fearing what they'll see.)
  • SpongeBob: What's happened? (looks down at body) Ohhh... I can't bear it anymore. I have a serious question to ask, Sandy.
  • Sandy (holding back tears): What, what is it? Can't you see I'm in mourning?
  • SpongeBob: Are our lives really worth it? We've tried so hard to get where we were, and then suddenly this epidemic comes and destroys our hope... and there sure won't be anymore where that came from. I feel like the scale of what's on our hands hasn't even fully begun yet. Wouldn't death be the best option in times like these?
  • Sandy: Death's the easy way out. If we manage to survive in this period, we could raise a new world order from the ashes, be eternally commended as heroes, gain inconceivable amounts of riches...
  • SpongeBob: Is money and fame really worth it? It can twist even the most stable person, make them snap like a twig. Just look at what it did to Mr. Krabs - from a respectable restaurant owner to an alcoholic pimp.
  • (The two stand silently for a second and walk back to the other members of the gang.)
  • Patrick: Sandy, are you okay? There's so much blood on you; I can't imagine what the zombies did! I hope they didn't bite -
  • (Sandy silences him by placing her hand over his mouth)
  • Sandy: No, they didn't bite me. This blood that stains my clothes and fur is not my own, however, it will forever be a stain on my conscience and wellbeing. To make a long story short, I came in just as those blasted abominations were attacking Nancy Suzy Fish. All this blood comes from my feeble attempts to save her and to kill the zombies. Two failures in one day - not bad going for me.
  • (The camera slowly pans away from the group, while they exchange gestures of hopelessness and fear. SpongeBob begins to narrate again.)
  • SpongeBob (narrating): At this very minute, the clock counting down the hours until the Infection hit at full force finally hit zero. (Cut to the streets, where ten zombies are huddled together in a circle, scavenging the sidewalk for suitable food.) No-one could pretend anymore, the world had changed, and certainly not for the better. (One zombie comes across the corpse of a recent victim of the disease, and invitingly gestures to the other zombies, who surround the body and begin feasting on it. The screen freezes on a zombie with a bloody face who is right in the middle of taking a meaty bite. Suddenly, the scene fast-forwards and images begin to frenetically rush by, including people running from zombies, stores closing, frightened people, and ending on an image of a run-down Barg 'n' Mart that is still open, despite the pandemic. Squidward and Sandy walk into it, pale-faced and terrified, closely followed by Patrick and SpongeBob.)
  • Patrick: Listen, guys, I don't want you to act like this; it brings us all down. One of us freaks out when we're in the midst of a zombie fight, that will kill us all. To survive in these times, we all need to strengthen our spirits. (motivationally) Acting all defeatist and wimpy won't get us anywhere, we need to accept challenges as they come and go. If a zombie appears, I don't expect you guys to back into a corner, I expect you to come up to those brainless bastards and give them a fight they'll remember. The ones who run away are the ones who lose in the end. To fight is to be strong, and if even if the battle is lost, when we're all dead on the ground, at least we'll have died as heroes. (even more motivationally) Do you want to be another number? Do you want to die without victory? I've been up all night, tossing and turning, braving myself for battle, and what are you doing? Crying and throwing yourself around! We should go into that store with our heads held high, and we shall fight until the bitter end. If we die, we die as heroes.
  • (For a second, everyone stays silent, a look of awe on their faces, and then, suddenly, a surge of determination flashes in the eyes of each and every member of the gang. They march on into the Barg 'n' Mart, ready for anything. Epic music plays, as they walk slowly but surely along the deserted aisles of the store. A frightened shopkeeper's frown changes to a smile, as he silently greets the gang, in admiration of their determination. Suddenly, Sandy turns her head around, to find several members of the SBAC purchasing groceries.)
  • Scientist 3 (evilly): We meet again, Sandy. Remember that time I almost killed you?
  • Sandy: Yes, and it's not exactly a pleasant memory. (pauses) But, I've got one thing to say to you.
  • Scientist 3: Make it quick; the sooner I release the paramecium, the better. (laughs)
  • Sandy: I'm sure these zombies aren't seeming so phony now.
  • Scientist 4: Oh, but they're not zombies. We've given up on the flu business, because the symptoms are more staggering, but we're pretty sure diseases of this caliber have existed, and then simply come and gone. These respectable people you demean by calling 'zombies' are simply victims of a temporary outbreak.
  • (We hear frantic banging and groaning at the door. Sandy turns around to see a zombie press his face against the window, leaving a bloody smear, and letting out a low and resonant growl.)
  • Sandy: See that? You don't call that a zombie?!
  • Scientist 5: I hate to admit it, but you're right. We've spent so much time inside trying to find a rational explanation, but I guess - I guess it was all for nothing. (to the other scientists) We've failed.
  • (The third scientist turns to the zombie, who is continuing to bang on the glass, sheds a single tear, fumbles through his pocket, and grabs the jar of mutated paramecium. As everyone in the store watches, horrified, he tips the jar all over himself, and within the span of around four seconds, he is almost entirely devoured by the viruses. We briefly see his skeleton falling to the floor. The fourth scientist, screaming and shivering, entirely traumatized by the ordeal, scoops up the paramecium, who are encumbered from the meal, puts them back in the jar, and closes it.)
  • Scientist 4: Monster... zombie... jar... virus... eaten... devoured... (he suddenly begins shrilly screaming and shouting unintelligible gibberish)
  • (Sandy walks away from the scientists, attempting to keep in mind Patrick's speech. We can see she is beginning to slip away from her previous unworried persona, and is obviously shaken by the previous events. She runs back to the main gang, who are prepared for anything that comes their way, and are brandishing various abnormal weapons, such as bricks, anvils and mirrors.)
  • Sandy: It turns out the scientists didn't know the full scale of what was upon us... they weren't so evil after all.
  • SpongeBob: But what of their previous evil acts?
  • Sandy: The thing is, here, apart from me being threatened with the specially-bred virus, they weren't actually doing anything evil. You should have - wait, you shouldn't - have seen their reaction when they saw one of the fully-infected zombies. I think the sight of that scientist emptying the jar of viruses on himself scarred me for life.
  • Squidward: Just get yourself a weapon and ready yourself for fighting the Infected.
  • Sandy: What should I get?
  • Squidward: Anything sharp or hard will do. Tell you what, we saved a hammer just for you. (he points to the ground, where a hammer, ripped out of its packaging, awaits. Sandy picks it up, and the four stand in line, locked in an aggressive pose, to ward off the zombies knocking at the door and windows.)
  • SpongeBob: I think it's time to end the waiting. (he breaks the wall open with his anvil, allowing the zombies to pour into the store.)
  • Patrick: CHARGE! (the gang form a circle around one zombie, rapidly pounding it with their weapons. It limps free of their grasp, and jumps on Patrick. Just before it can take a bite, Sandy smashes its head with a hammer, and the scene cuts away as blood splatters on a wall. Patrick rejoins the line of fighters, as they are pitted against two zombies. SpongeBob throws the anvil at the zombie's chest, knocking the wind out of it, and it falls onto the ground, not before Patrick destroys the brain of the zombie with a brick.)
  • SpongeBob: Remember, those two victories don't mean anything. We're not trained, that was just luck. When you come in to kill these two last zombies, remind yourself that you might not win.
  • (The gang continue to chase the zombies across the store, gripping their now-bloodstained weapons tightly, until they come across the scientists, two of who have been eaten by zombies. Squidward retches, but not before he tosses the mirror at the third zombie, slicing it horizontally in half. SpongeBob runs to its living half, and as he swings his anvil, the zombie grabs his leg and begins shaking him around. Sandy intervenes, and the scene cuts away as we hear a squishing sound.)
  • SpongeBob: Sandy, I can never thank you enough. You're amazing in combat.
  • Sandy: Don't worship me yet. We still have another zombie to kill.
  • Patrick: (he dashes towards SpongeBob and Sandy) We still have another zombie to kill? Nuh-uh, check this out. (he holds up a zombie's head but then drops it, disgusted) Ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, ew, ew...
  • Sandy: You know what, Patrick? Your motivational speech really aided me in battle, it encouraged me to not give up no matter the circumstances. But, there was something about killing them that got to me. It just felt really horrible. I've hunted animals back in Texas, and never felt too horrified about it, but this was on a whole new level. I mean... they used to be like us, with a family and kids and... ***damn it, I can't go on.
  • Patrick: I'm truly pleased that my speech helped you on your first step to heroism. Also, I'm glad that you also feel remorse for the infected you took the life away from - if there's one thing you shouldn't do, it's get desensitized. You'll become numb to the plight of those around you, and that's something you sure-as-hell shouldn't do in times like these.
  • Squidward: Remember, we practically haven't done anything yet though. I have to admit, four zombie kills is okay, but have we significantly decreased the zombie population? No. Have we found the cure? No. Have we become highly respected yet? No.
  • SpongeBob: Still, we have done something, and I think we should be thankful for that.
  • Squidward: We've got a long way to go.
  • (As the scene cuts to an bird's eye view of the Barg 'n' Mart that slowly pans out to reveal the wasteland Bikini Bottom has become, SpongeBob begins narrating again.)
  • SpongeBob: Welcome to New Bikini Bottom, the real home of the brave. (pauses) It's gonna be a bumpy ride.



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